Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Polysphincter in Chief: W Ducks Responsibility Once Again

It was all smiles during the first post-election meeting between President Bush and President-elect Obama- and why not? Bush can act as if he is presiding over a historic moment, ostensibly hoping that it will deflect from the elections absolute repudiation of his entire presidency. But, as the saying goes, “Excuses are like butt holes, everyone has got one.” And President Bush has more than one.

Unfortunately for Bush, facts are facts and the fact is that pretty much everything he has touched in his life has caught on fire. Yet each time he has a scapegoat waiting in the wings. In the aftermath of Katrina, he defended his slow response by intimating that the Governor of Louisiana didn’t ask for help. He blamed the insurgency in Iraq on Iran to cover up the colossal blunder of disbanding the Iraqi army. The financial melt down of 2008 wasn’t because he dismantled regulations over the banking industry but because of Wall Street greed beyond his control. After every rationale for invading Iraq had been debunked, he blamed George Tenet for faulty intelligence (although he did give him the Congressional Medal of Freedom.) In fact, W’s only skill, it would appear, is spin. Matthew Yglesias said it best “"It sure seemed obvious that the Administration was clueless in Iraq and many other places, but the press has consistently given the Bushies the benefit of the doubt on basic competence, despite ample evidence to the contrary. I think the most likely reason is that the press admired the skill the Administration has displayed in manipulating the press.” Oh, how he could make the press swoon with his folksy charm.

Psychologists, no doubt, would say that this is a survival skill developed by having a domineering mother and distant and uninvolved father- well fuck him- we all got our shit to deal with. There are only two things he has ruined that make me rejoice, the Republican Party and the Texas Rangers. Hmmm, maybe we should make W “Commander in Chief for Life” of Texas and jettison the whole state from the Union. Would you miss it?

Unfortunately for W, even Turd Blossom can't spin the last eight years. So it seems that Georgie’s legacy will be that of Bart Simpson, a trouble making underachiever thrust into the limelight whose best contribution to America was “I didn’t do it, you didn’t see me, you can’t prove anything.”

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