Thursday, November 6, 2008

Palins Power Play


"Can Palin Pesurrect the GOP? Does She Want To?" That's the headline I woke up to. If Republicans make her their choice four years from now they'll have a large "to-do" list to get her ready. Of course her crazy christian views are solid, so they can check that one off. The rest will require taking an intellectually lazy lump of clay and teaching it history, civics and English. I've compiled an abridged list of things to teach her...

Africa is a continent, not a country. Mongolia, Turkey and Burma are not in Africa. Run on sentences sound just as bad spoken as written. There is no "real" America. Dmitry Medvedev, not Vladmir Putin, is the President of Russia. Average Joe's do not shop at Neiman Marcus. The Vice President does not lead the Senate. The Bush Doctrine is not a Dan Brown novel. The difference between being a "Maverick" and being a nut job. Libson is not the capital of Spain (Madrid.) NAFTA includes Canada, the U.S. and Mexico. Mexico is not in South America. Most of the world does not practice Christianity. Bono is not the head of state of Ireland. Bono is not his real name.

In light of Tuesday nights blood bath, the GOP must chart a new course. If they settle on Palin, they will be "filling an empty vessel, so the task is relatively easy. But it will take time", according to a Kissinger aide. Many christian conservatives will say "so what, she has solid social conservative credentials", and they may be right. But didn't they try the same thing with another "empty vessel" 8 years ago? And look where that got us...

1 comment:

tommy said...

Dude, WHAT are you doing? Are you nuts? Don't be giving free advice to the GOP...

Don't listen to him, Republicans! You did everything right! The Democrats STOLE the election, with their rigged voting machines! They won't get away with it next time, I promise, just keep doing what you did this time around... TRUST ME!!!

Now, if you haven't already seen it, go check out the South Park election spoof. Brilliant!